“So Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him till daybreak.” – Genesis 32:24

Wrestling with God

Alone, I wrestle
I don't need God, to do battle 

Wounded, I bleed on the ground in the dirt
from the very mud I sling

My heart's agony bleeds for the bloodshed from one small incision
blood stained hands drip with the Ephesians 6 principalities I know not 
But they know me intimately 

They strike at tarnished armour, and know how to wound
pride 
jealousy
self-rightousness 
lanced peace is the final blow of defeat

the Screwtape Letters next chapter is complete
the demons laugh with glee 
as Lewis sadly shakes his head
another one bites the dust 

Dead in the darkness
too weary to wrestle 
with the only one 
who can heal

Hidden from the hands that spar
The scarred hands that fashioned my own 
dejected, I  limp away in the darkness 
but the humble light from holy hands insist on guiding me home

"I will not let you go until I bless you!"

Not how the story goes 
but the author knows the Truth of his own story
so He can write the final chapter 
any way he damn well pleases

The day light consecrates the darkness and He blesses
undeserving, he empathizes with the limp I carry
The Peniel wound stays 
to forever remind me of the face 
that both blesses and forgives

part 2 - to be continued

“When he reached a certain place, he stopped for the night because the sun had set. Taking one of the stones there, he put it under his head and lay down to sleep. He had a dream in which he saw a stairway resting on the earth, with its top reaching to heaven, and the angels of God were ascending and descending on it.” – Genesis 28:11-12